My Official Weekend Report

February 12, 2007

GreenMo1

…in the laboratory…

GreenMo2

…it’s …ALIVE…

This is my official weekend report as required by the legal division of BrotherJonesOnTheWeb. Why I am the only brother that has to fill one of these forms out, I do not know.

The weather has turned vicious here in Northeastern Indiana, and we are running low on fire wood. This, however, is not a problem for a manly woodcutter like me. I walked into my garage to fire up my manly chain saw only to discover that whoever used it last had knocked the chain off and left the saw in disrepair. I, (of course), was the last person to use my chain saw sometime last summer.

I put the saw back together, (a very manly thing to do), did a cold weather start on it, hiked into the woods behind my house and started cutting lumber. I then drove my SUV back to collect the wood, got it stuck in a snow drift, got it unstuck, and then made several manly trips back and forth picking up wood, hauling wood and stacking wood.

Then I made a sock monkey… another very manly thing to do.

The Comments

Don Jones

This morning on the news they were reporting that burning freshly cut wood from the ice damage was not a good idea. it needs to DRY OUT (for about a year). Otherwise, you are building up some serious creosote in your chimney by burning it. I suggest burning your dirty laundry for heat. Stay warm and cut down on your warshin’ at the same time.

Dennis Jones

sorry, can’t talk now… putting out fire in house…

Dennis Jones

…make that house fire… gotta go…

Don Jones

HOOK UP A HOSE! Better yet…. GRAB THE HOT DOGS and MARSHMELLOWS!!!

Doug Jones

great looking monkey! uh, great looking MANLY sock monkey, that is… I can read the expression on his face… it says, “I wanna move to Florida!” It got down to freezing for a couple of days here and I immediately got tired of winter. I actually had to put a coat on… can you believe it? Two days of cold weather is all I need. No sign of flakes so far. This is all good cuz I don’t have a chainsaw… or woods to go cut down trees in. but we DO have deer that were eating anything green in our flower garden yesterday…

Doug Jones

Hey… I was expecting to see Weasel Boy on the Grammys last night. What happened? Did you get bumped by Sting?

Dennis Jones

…WeaselBoy wasn’t even nominated for anything! …what’s up with that?

WeaselBoy

😦

Dennis Jones

…they’ve been predicting bad weather for us all week and last night our Severe Winter Weather WATCH turned into a Severe Winter Weather WARNING… fortunately, today we are no longer under that warning… we are now under a BLIZZARD Warning… whew!… I think we dodged a bullet on that one…

Dennis Jones

…hmm …they’re saying now that we are going to have white out conditions …I didn’t think they even made white out any longer… I mean, with computers and all, who really needs it anymore? …anyway, I looked out the window to see what was going on, but couldn’t really see anything…

Dennis Jones

…hmm …they just declared a Level 2 Travel Advisory… unless you are an emergency vehicle you will be ticketed if you are on the road driving around… but I am needing a Krispie Kreme Donut right now, REALLY BAD and there are none left in the house… that’s an emergency, isn’t it?

Don Jones

GET IN THE CAR AND GO NOW MAN!!! IF JACK BAUER CAN UNDO NUKLEEAR BOMBS YOU CAN GET TO WAL-MART AND BACK WITH DONUTS!!!

Dennis Jones

…I guess I didn’t realize how simple it is to disarm a nuclear bomb… but after watching Jack disarm one on TV last night I feel pretty confident that I could do it, too, in a pinch… if that situation ever arose here in Huntington… like in my neighborhood or something…

Doug Jones

If you could put one of those Nookier suitcase bombs on your driveway, it would probably get rid of your snow for you… and your neighbor’s snow… and your neighbor’s neighbor’s snow… and ….

Don Jones

Attention my brothers I’m planning on buying a couple of syringes of Sodium Pentothal for you next Christmas.

Doug Jones

oh, goody! I love it when we play “torture the brother!”

Dennis Jones

…I’m thinking Jack is going to have to kill his entire family plus a couple of in-laws to save the world this time…

Don Jones

and the little dog too!!!

Dennis Jones

…NOT TOTO!!!

Doug Jones

how much snow do you have???

Dan Lietha

If those of you in this ice-encased frozen zone are trapped in your house (that hasn’t burnt down from creosote build up in the chimney) and you have to wait for the ice to melt to rejoin civilization, check out this guy’s digital painting info blog: danidraws.com Great info!

Dan Lietha

Correction … check out this GAL’S digital painting web site: danidraws.com OOPS!

Doug Jones

I had just found this site recently myself… great information there!

Doballoo

I see she’s a D. Jones too. That does it I’m changing my name to Doballoo Jones in an attempt to monetize on my nascent illustration career

Dennis Jones

…ok, well now… where are we today? I started shoveling snow at the crack of dawn and did that for most of the morning… how much snow did we get you ask? …pastorally speaking I would have to say we had drifts at least 12 feet high… realistically more like 2 or 3… which is nothing to snuff at when you are shoveling it all by hand… so now I’m trying to catch up on work…

…I noticed the danidraws girls last name is Jones… she’s not a sister I’ve accidentally forgotten about, is she?

Dougaloo

Dougaloo… has a nice ring to it, eh? I don’t recall a sister named Dani… maybe one named Mani would be more like it…

Don Jones

How about our sister Norah? We’ve yet to hear from her since she hit the bigtime…

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