February 1, 2007
…riding his trusty Indianapolis Colt…
In a little known sub-story from the Lord Of The Rings Trilogy, Eomer of Rohan gallops into battle on his trusty Indianapolis Colt to combat the dreaded Bearmen of Chicagohan.
February 12, 2007
…in the laboratory…
…it’s …ALIVE…
This is my official weekend report as required by the legal division of BrotherJonesOnTheWeb. Why I am the only brother that has to fill one of these forms out, I do not know.
The weather has turned vicious here in Northeastern Indiana, and we are running low on fire wood. This, however, is not a problem for a manly woodcutter like me. I walked into my garage to fire up my manly chain saw only to discover that whoever used it last had knocked the chain off and left the saw in disrepair. I, (of course), was the last person to use my chain saw sometime last summer.
I put the saw back together, (a very manly thing to do), did a cold weather start on it, hiked into the woods behind my house and started cutting lumber. I then drove my SUV back to collect the wood, got it stuck in a snow drift, got it unstuck, and then made several manly trips back and forth picking up wood, hauling wood and stacking wood.
Then I made a sock monkey… another very manly thing to do.
This morning on the news they were reporting that burning freshly cut wood from the ice damage was not a good idea. it needs to DRY OUT (for about a year). Otherwise, you are building up some serious creosote in your chimney by burning it. I suggest burning your dirty laundry for heat. Stay warm and cut down on your warshin’ at the same time.
sorry, can’t talk now… putting out fire in house…
…make that house fire… gotta go…
HOOK UP A HOSE! Better yet…. GRAB THE HOT DOGS and MARSHMELLOWS!!!
great looking monkey! uh, great looking MANLY sock monkey, that is… I can read the expression on his face… it says, “I wanna move to Florida!” It got down to freezing for a couple of days here and I immediately got tired of winter. I actually had to put a coat on… can you believe it? Two days of cold weather is all I need. No sign of flakes so far. This is all good cuz I don’t have a chainsaw… or woods to go cut down trees in. but we DO have deer that were eating anything green in our flower garden yesterday…
Hey… I was expecting to see Weasel Boy on the Grammys last night. What happened? Did you get bumped by Sting?
…WeaselBoy wasn’t even nominated for anything! …what’s up with that?
😦
…they’ve been predicting bad weather for us all week and last night our Severe Winter Weather WATCH turned into a Severe Winter Weather WARNING… fortunately, today we are no longer under that warning… we are now under a BLIZZARD Warning… whew!… I think we dodged a bullet on that one…
…hmm …they’re saying now that we are going to have white out conditions …I didn’t think they even made white out any longer… I mean, with computers and all, who really needs it anymore? …anyway, I looked out the window to see what was going on, but couldn’t really see anything…
…hmm …they just declared a Level 2 Travel Advisory… unless you are an emergency vehicle you will be ticketed if you are on the road driving around… but I am needing a Krispie Kreme Donut right now, REALLY BAD and there are none left in the house… that’s an emergency, isn’t it?
GET IN THE CAR AND GO NOW MAN!!! IF JACK BAUER CAN UNDO NUKLEEAR BOMBS YOU CAN GET TO WAL-MART AND BACK WITH DONUTS!!!
…I guess I didn’t realize how simple it is to disarm a nuclear bomb… but after watching Jack disarm one on TV last night I feel pretty confident that I could do it, too, in a pinch… if that situation ever arose here in Huntington… like in my neighborhood or something…
If you could put one of those Nookier suitcase bombs on your driveway, it would probably get rid of your snow for you… and your neighbor’s snow… and your neighbor’s neighbor’s snow… and ….
Attention my brothers I’m planning on buying a couple of syringes of Sodium Pentothal for you next Christmas.
oh, goody! I love it when we play “torture the brother!”
…I’m thinking Jack is going to have to kill his entire family plus a couple of in-laws to save the world this time…
and the little dog too!!!
…NOT TOTO!!!
how much snow do you have???
If those of you in this ice-encased frozen zone are trapped in your house (that hasn’t burnt down from creosote build up in the chimney) and you have to wait for the ice to melt to rejoin civilization, check out this guy’s digital painting info blog: danidraws.com Great info!
Correction … check out this GAL’S digital painting web site: danidraws.com OOPS!
I had just found this site recently myself… great information there!
I see she’s a D. Jones too. That does it I’m changing my name to Doballoo Jones in an attempt to monetize on my nascent illustration career
…ok, well now… where are we today? I started shoveling snow at the crack of dawn and did that for most of the morning… how much snow did we get you ask? …pastorally speaking I would have to say we had drifts at least 12 feet high… realistically more like 2 or 3… which is nothing to snuff at when you are shoveling it all by hand… so now I’m trying to catch up on work…
…I noticed the danidraws girls last name is Jones… she’s not a sister I’ve accidentally forgotten about, is she?
Dougaloo… has a nice ring to it, eh? I don’t recall a sister named Dani… maybe one named Mani would be more like it…
How about our sister Norah? We’ve yet to hear from her since she hit the bigtime…
February 15, 2007
…a special delivery Monkey Gram…
…custom made for Valentine’s Day…
…a rigorous marketing campaign…
Have you ever noticed that every time a holiday rolls around you start hearing on the radio that a really great gift would be a Lobster Gram… or a Pajama Gram… or a Vermont Teddy Bear?
I was teasing my wife the other day telling her that with all the snow we had gotten I wasn’t sure whether her Pajama Gram would arrive in time for Valentines Day or not. She said, “Listen buddy, if I get a Pajama Gram for Valentines Day you’re toast.”
Good thing I got her a Huntington Monkey Gram instead.
I like those long, skinny arms and legs. SocMo would like for this guy to come over to play with him. You can send him along when you ship those unused chips and salsa to me…
Hmmm… I seem to be going by the name Dougaloo now… just so you don’t get confused. DON”T send it to any other of those LOO guys…
…I have been studying SocMo and trying to figure out what gives him his attitude… I think I got it… it’s the sock hat… my next monkey is gettin’ a sock hat…
of course it’s the hat! you wouldn’t send a sock monkey out in this weather without a had would ya?
…word on the street is Huntington Monkey Grams will soon be offering their “aLOO” line of monkeys which features the DougaLOO Salsa Monkey, the DonaLOO No Coffee Monkey and the beloved original, RobaLOO Snuggle Monkey…
There’s nothing on Valentine’s Day that says “I love you” more than a car load of green wood, some stale chips and salsa, and a handcrafted Huntington Monkey Gram! Good job DennyLOO.
…who wouldn’t be thrilled to receive an old sock for a Valentines Day present?
It’s thoughtful AND economical!
Skip to my Loo
what about me?
If you wait too long, skipping to the loo is not a good idea.
February 22, 2007
…rodent problems…
I’ve been dealing with a rodent problem this week at my house. I didn’t even know I had a rodent problem until I hauled my computer into the shop on Monday.
The cursor was no longer functioning properly on screen, (which caused me to cursor several times as I tried to figure out what was wrong). We found out that my utilities folder had magically disappeared… which is really pretty weird… and also that my Logitech Scroll Mouse had fritzed out… darn rodents…
The tech asked me when I last did regular maintenance on my computer. I said… uhm, never. He reinstalled the operating system to correct the utility folder situation and I tossed the LogiTech Scroll Mouse in the trash. The cool thing about the reinstall is that I was running on the older “Panther” system but he put in the newer “Tiger” system for me… HOO HOO!
Unfortunately, now I’m spending most of my time playing with those little Tiger Widgets instead of working.
I wuz starting to wunder what wuz up with yu… There’z nuthin’ like a new utiliteez folder and computoor systum to get one’s motor runnin’. “Get yo ‘puter runnin’… head out on the highway! Lookin’ for URLs.. or whatever comes my way…”
I’m still Widgetless myself…. I was beginning to think you were buried under tons of snow. I had just enlisted Jack Bauer to organize a search team to find you and dig you out…
…I took my computer in on Monday and didn’t get it back until late yesterday, so I haven’t been on the internet all week…
Brother JONES… Now Computer Accessible!
I did not realize that Tiger Woods had widgets on the market. He’s into everything.
…didn’t Keegan make a widget of some sort?
Affirmative. I believe there’s a link to it from keeganjones.com. Pick up hostile at 1408 Brenthaven.
less rodents, more monkeygrams… that’s what I say.
…I say… New For 2007… RodentGrams!
Nick Jones Everybody … sorry to see you got kicked off American Idol last night. Your rendition of “American Pie” was moving, and quite long.
I wonder if Steve Taylor was the cause of your computer problem?
…you caught me RobalLOO… I am a rabid Steve Taylor fan… have been for years… I got to see him live a while back at the Cornerstone Festival in Illinois… he can still put on a great show… I still sprinkle Taylor lyrics into my everyday conversation… “since I gave up hope, I feel a lot better”…
First rock concert I went to was Steve Taylor opening up for Petra. That was a blast. Cornerstone was an amazing experience the time I got to go.
February 23, 2007
…what I’m working on today…
What I’m working on today.
…this is what I’m working on today…
…this is what you are woiking on today?
…yes, this is what I’m working on today…
You’re cleaning your shoes?
…I’m drawing my shoes…
you clean your shoes with an eraser?
…yes, this is what I’m working on today…
Looks like you have an “open door” policy at the studio. Your employees probably appreciate your ready availability… except when you have your stinkin’ shoes off.
so… what are you working on today?
…well, basically this is what I’m working on today…
… what was it you were workin’ on again?
…I’m working on milking this for all it’s worth…
dude, I love all your pictures. And I cant wait to see the rest of this one.
Dennis, is that what you worked on, on Friday? Phew…one can almost smell your sneakers. Sweet.
test
No one told me there would be a test today.
…me either …apparently it’s a pop quiz…
Q: How many stinky reference sneakers does it take to accurately draw an oversized piece of teenage footwear?
A: __ .
…this is a trick question, right? …because I only need one shoe to use as reference… but Doug apparently requires four…
…but cows have 4 legs
…so it WAS a trick question…
Q #2: What do you get when a Hobbit sees his shadow on February 26?
…this is the longest test I’ve taken in years…
HINT: Six more weeks of __?
six more weeks of donuts?
six more weeks of old worn-out tennis shoes on the drawing board.
…this has to be one of the stupidest blogs we’ve produced at Brother Jones in years…
…something we can all take pride in…
It’s one to print out for that archive book!
…well …I am the official Brother Jones Historian… (self-proclaimed) …at least for the Dennis page…
February 27, 2007
…our hero, Jeff Saturday…
I finally got around to reinstalling the drivers for my Wacom Tablet after my system switch, so it’s back up and working again. Last night to make sure it was running right, I piddling around with this old sketch of Jeff Saturday. Did you hear Indianapolis won the SuperBowl this year? Have I mentioned I live in Indiana and am a Colts fan? I have? Oh. Sorry…
Jeff Saturday is the real deal. I recently read a magazine article about his faith in Christ along with other born-again Colts. Amen.
Indianapolis Coats? Is that what you wear up there in the winter? Say… what kind of computer maitenance are we supposed to be doing? Did the tech guy tell you?
…I believe offensive juggernaut center/runningback Jeff Saturday scored the go-ahead touchdown in the AFC Championship game this year… the only game of the season I DIDN’T get to see… aARrrrrgh…
…yes Doug, I have several Indianapolis Winter Coats in my closet downstairs… they come in handy as I shovel snow… again… and again… and again…
…computer maintenance… I’m not really too sure what we are supposed to be doing… all I know about a computer is that when I punch the button on the front a little blue light comes on and it starts working…
I think the tech guy maybe de-fragged the hard drive and re-dejuggulated the fraxamazoid… something like that…
I bet he had to pull out the defibulators as well…
…I do seem to remember him slapping a couple of paddles onto the sides of my computer and yelling clear… but I thought he was just trying to jump start it…
I hope he didn’t damage the flux capacitor when he did that…
…yes, it was a risky move, but the only other thing that could generate that much power is a bolt of lightning and it’s impossible to determine when and where they will strike…
That is very true… unless you have the BrotherJones lightning predictor. Available for $9.95….
…I am offering (for a limited time only) an “earth-friendly” Brother Jones Lightning Predictor made exclusively out of gourds… it also predicts whether you are global warming or not…
Didn’t Al Gore have one of those that didn’t work? He got hit with 50 jigawatts of lightning and never was the same…. … except he did put on a few pounds…
…this is true, Doug… the “earth friendly” Brother Jones Lightning Predictor doesn’t actually work… but that’s not important… it’s the good intentions that count… and I certainly intended for it to work…
Nice use of shadows inside the helmet and I like the color combos. Yer Wacoming skills are getting better.
Hi Dennis…….a new fan from South Africa..maybe the same age!! My question…what is the average size of your artwork you work on?
…thanks RobalLOO…
…Doug from South Africa… the size of most of the professional work I do runs around 8×10 to 12×18 depending on what the job calls for… (right now I’m doing posters that run 18×24 in size)… most of the Wacom things that I do are just for fun and all come out of my 8×11 sketchbook…
The Comments
Doug Jones
Where is Elmer’s plaid hat?
Don Jones
Den, I’m thinking this is your Super Bowl prediction. Colts over Bears in a RUNAWAY!!! Pass the Guachamoldie!!
Mark Behm
Hah ha! Great armor.
Dennis Jones
…as it is with all good tales, our hero’s fate was in question throughout most of the story… but with the help of his trustworthy Indianapolis Colt, Rohan galloped on to victory …29 to 17…
Don Jones
Dennis, you need to pack up and move it back to MO and fast. The Chiefs are down but not completely OUT. Your Super Bo-Mo-Jo is just what Coach Herm is needing!
Doug Jones
Yeah… move outta that frozen waste land… OR.. move to Wisconsin and give Farve a little help next year
Dennis Jones
…I bought a brand new bag of hi-priced “On The Border” chips and “On The Border” salsa to munch on during the Super Bowl, got engaged in the drama that was unfolding before me on the tv set and forgot to eat them… rats… the game could have been SO much better if I had just remembered them…
Doug Jones
Those chips and salsa are HORRID! (a little Simon Cowell lingo, there) Why don’t you FedEx them to me and I will dispose of them for you.
Dennis Jones
…I think I will just hang onto them so I will have chips n salsa ready next year as I am watching the Colts win the Super Bowl again…
Doug Jones
that ship has sailed… next year it’ll be Vince Young getting a free Escalade…
Doug Jones
I was just wondering… does this guy strap on a couple of diapers so he doesn’t have to make stops on his journey?
Dennis Jones
…I don’t know about him, but I’m trying it on my next journey to Mtn. Grove… if it’s good enough for Nasa astronauts, it’s good enough for me…
Doug Jones
I bet this makes the postal workers happy. Now instead of going “postal” you can say someone is going “Astro”
Dennis Jones
…or as Astro from the Jetson’s would say… Rastro!
Don Jones
I can’t seem to be able to comment on the recent Sock Monkey Wood Retrieval page. Must be from all that snow you received up there around the Lakes.