I’ll Have A Shake, Please

April 18, 2008

BukBucaneer1

Karen flew out to the west coast yesterday, so I’m here at home alone. At 5:35 this morning, someone grabbed hold of my bed and started shaking it back and forth violently. It woke me up, I looked to see who it was, nobody was in the room and the bed continued to shake.

It is a somewhat disturbing thing to wake up from a deep sleep and discover that you are riding a bucking bed in an empty room.

I immediately reached the rational conclusion that the bed was possessed… or the house was possessed… or the house was being repossessed by the mortgage company. Space aliens perhaps trying to scoop me up in their tractor beam? The second coming… was I having trouble getting off the ground?

Nope, it was an earthquake… a 5.4 earthquake somewhere to the east of us. Go figure, my wife is in California enjoying nice weather and I’m here in Indiana riding out an earthquake.

The Comments

Doug Jones

I think it was a shifting of the time zone plates in Indiana. You are so messed up with your time zones. I hope no sock creatures were injured in the shake up…

Doug Jones

oh… the transition to digital painting looks complete to me!

Dennis Jones

…I have been hoping to transition from Padawan Learner to Jedi Digital Knight, but am not sure how strong the force is with me yet…

Dennis Jones

…11:15 Eastern time… we just had another shake… this is getting interesting…

Dennis Jones

…a 4.2 on the aftershock…

Doug Jones

put some chocolate in a glass of milk, set it on the counter and wait a while….

Jason Bourne

ARRR…matey! Shake and bake!

Don Jones

Enjoy those tremors and stabilize everything that is important to you. That would be your coffee pot, your new digital tablet, and the beloved Sears Craftsmen mower.

roballoo

Well, if there’s one thing I don’t mind outsourcing from California it’s our earthquakes!

Dennis Jones

…uhm, a little Brother Jones Helpful Hint for everybody… when your wife is out of town and you go to the grocery store to buy yourself something fun and exotic to eat, don’t get the Kroger battered minced fish… definitely not the wisest move you can make… the “minced” in the title should be your first clue that this is a questionable item at best…

Don Jones

I think minced means “blenderized” and then shaped back into fish patties.

Dennis Jones

…it kinda had huge mystery chunks in it… not the smooth, blenderized texture I was hoping for…

Doug Jones

it’s hard to beat a Hebrew National Hot Dog…

Jason Bourne

I love burgers,fries and the famous chacolate malt….yummmy.

Dennis Jones

SERENITY NOW

Doug Jones

…. and don’t forget the awesome Soylent Green burger…

Jason Bourne

Ah,yeas. And then it will be time to go to the hospital for some cleaning of the arteries,LOL.

Dennis Jones

SERENITY NOW

Advertisements

Space Monkey

June 2, 2008

SpaceMonkey2

On Saturday I grabbed a hand grinder that’s supposed to be used on car bodies and sharpened the three blades of my riding lawnmower. It’s not exactly the correct tool to use for this, but being an experienced professional, I made it work.

Unfortunately, my wife walked into the garage as I was arcing a river of sparks onto the hood of her car. She apparently had some sort of problem with this and also pointed out to me that the stream of flame I was creating was also arcing over our oily push mower, a couple of gas cans and the dried grass I had just cleaned off of the riding mower. Women! 😦

I finished sharpening the blades, but then I wasn’t sure if they were supposed to be aligned on the mower in some special way, so I found the operating manual, turned to the correct page and in big bold letters it said, WARNING, we recommend you DO NOT try to sharpen blades yourself. Apparently, some rocket scientist somewhere had decided blades must be perfectly balanced in order to cut grass. Rocket Scientists! 😦

Just to be on the safe side, I created a very sophisticated tool in order to balance my blades consisting of a pencil and a piece of rope I found on the floor of my garage. My blades were perfectly balanced according to this, so I put the mower back together and am happy to report that it is working just fine except for the violent shaking that occurs when the blades are engaged…

The Comments

Bernard

My goodness…I thought I had smelled too much terps in my life. This is funny stuff…as for the wife. God did say that it was not good for man to be alone, though I’m not sure that fire prevention was precisley what He meant when He said that. Scientists…they did prefer the Monkey over us originally. But the Monkey couldn’t raise the money. So, now you got a Mower that goes with your shaking bed…I’d consider moving out of that place If I were you. Funny Stuff, thanks, Bernard

Dennis Jones

…the good thing about a riding lawnmower that shakes violently is that you don’t really even notice the earthquakes that much…

Dennis Jones

…ps …sorry about those Penguins… I rooted for them until the beginning of the third period and then fell asleep and apparently without my staunch support behind them they lost game 4… don’t blame them… blame me…

Don Jones

I say, close your eyes when you’re mowing and you’ll think you’re flying a helicopter.

Dennis Jones

…I usually do that when I’m driving the car…

Doug Jones

So… you can cut your grass and have a relaxing massage at the same time… cool!

Bernard

Ha…this is funnier than laugh-in! Doug, Don: a graphic mind is a funny thing to have…can’t stop laughin’ here on your comments. Since it’s obvious Dennis is the fall guy, are you two the straight men in this act? Dennis, can you try some radical coffee bean concoction tonight in order to stay awake seeing as it could be the last game for the birds?

Jason Bourne

Kool. This is one of the best… Never send a man to an apes job.

brett

cool space monkey looks like the one in your drawing book.And the one in the new movie space chimps.(: lol!

Dennis Jones

…it IS the one in my drawing book! …good memory, Brett!

Bernard

What drawing book? Checked Amazon…nada. Seriously, have you ever considered having the art from your sketchbooks printed and sold as sketchbooks? Like the artists over at: brandstudiopress.com I don’t know what their costs or quantity mins. are but I can vouch for their quality. Bought a couple of them and the printing/paper/covers are first class. It seems to be all the rage these days with artists. Finished sketches or not. I bet your stuff would sell off the shelf! Of course I would want an autographed one of yours. —BM

Roballoo!

Blurb let’s you self publish yer own books. Can’t vouch for them myself – but at least from the web site – but appears to be a quality product.

Dennis Jones

…Brett is my nephew and a few weeks ago he was looking thru the sketchbook I was carrying and remembered this page, apparently…

…I have bought a couple of those Brand Studio books myself and they are done really well…

…I actually have a Blurb book put together but I just haven’t pulled the trigger on it yet…

Bernard

Dennis, Thanks for staying up so late last night to keep the Pens in it for another game!

Dan Lietha

PULL THE TRIGGER on the book! 🙂

Dennis Jones

…Bernard, when the Redwings pulled even in the third and then peppered in like 600 shots on net for the rest of the period and got the lead I kinda figured it was all over for the Penguins but the crying… then the Pens dramatically tied the game seconds before the game was to be over… high drama! …to me this is starting to feel a lot like the invincible Patriots facing the underdog Giants in the last Superbowl… good series!

Jason Bourne

I’m in anticipation indeed!

Dennis Jones

…Dan, right now I have a book full of pictures and absolutely no words in it, which is probably a good thing, I don’t know… anyway, maybe I’ll polish it up and publish it later on this summer… call it “Mime” or “Mums The Word” or something…

Doug Jones

call it… “I’m Speechless”…

Roballoo!

Oooh – looking forward to the book. Will it have before and after pictures or is it all finished art at this point?

Dennis Jones

…at this point it is all just sitting on my computer and can still be anything I want it to be… what types of things do you think would be good to put in it?

Dan Lietha

I think it’d be great to see development sketches to final product. Even sketches that didn’t work and reasons why. Collections of finished pieces are nice, but I like to see the behind the scenes stuff. My 2 cents … but willing to pay much more for the book!

Bernard

Wow, this is an interesting question because…before this past year your transitional or “how It’s done” section would have kicked into a Gouache primer and the steps that process entails. Now, seeing as you have undoubtedly growned some new digital Wacom/Cintiq/Photoshop legs…do you go there instead or in addition too? I agree with Dan L. and all but don’t let the “how-To” be the biggie. Your finished pieces are still what rocks the world! “We Wanna A Book”,”We Wanna A Book”,”We Wanna A Book”!

Jason Bourne

If you have any dinosaurs, you could do a big one page image of a T-rex’s mouth wide open showing all the teeth…

Dan Lietha

If it turned out to be all finished art, I’d pay up just as fast to buy it. Dinosaurs have my vote too. 🙂

Don Jones

I’d like to see some early grade school work included… and a few church bulletin covers.

Dennis Jones

…ok, lets see now… this book needs to be an omnibus album which starts with my grade school art, then the gouache middle ages, and ends in the digital world, but also includes pencil sketches, tutorials, step by step seminars, church bulletins and one dinosaur with a lot of teeth… a piece of cake!

Doug Jones

and a special monkey section

Jason Bourne

Alright, sounds fantastic to me!

Bernard

I think you got it! except: NO SOCKS or GOURDS!

Dennis Jones

HEY!

gary Locke

doooood! i thought weasel boy was some one over at focus on the family! doood!!! you are getting good! do you work on a cintiq yet?

Dennis Jones

…hey Gary …I was beginning to wonder if you were ever going to figure out who weaselboy was… I’ve been enjoying your blog… I got a Cintiq a few months back and it is quite the fancy work tool…