Lets Put This Issue To Rest

December 5, 2005


There has been much rumor and speculation in the halls of Brother Jones Corporate Headquarters about an important issue that I would like to clear up at this time.

Yes… I lettered in sports in the 7th and 8th grade. I put a lot of time and effort into holding down my end of the bench during very important games and, as you can see, was richly rewarded for my valuable contributions to the team.

I hope this clears up any misinformation that seems to have been floating around out there.

The Comments

Doug Jones

didn’t you get a purple heart or something after getting splinter from the bench? It is all very fuzzy in my memory now… maybe the medal is in that box… keep looking….

Don Jones

Yes, you got a letter but wasn’t it the letter W? (mr. waterboy)

Dennis Jones

…well boys… my memory of those fabulous days of jr. high sporting are somewhat hazy now, too, I’m afraid… I know I was on the football, basketball, and track teams… I know I hardly played any time at all in the real games… only if we were winning by half a kazillion points…

I did have one highlight during basketball… (Don, you may remember this)… I was fouled in a game and was too shy to go up to the line to shoot… the ref could not remember who the foul was on so he randomly pulled one of my teammates to the line to shoot… little Donnie was a bit peeved with his older brother Dennie about this situation after the game…

Don Jones

That’s because I had relentlessly worked with you on the tennis courts honing your brick-of-a-shot free throw skills to no avail. You could’a been a b-ball phenom. Got an additional letter “P” or sumthin’.

Dennis Jones

…I cooda been a contenda…

Don Jones

The graphics of that “LETTER” document is top-knotch 70s style. That would be hard to duplicate now days with our slick fonts and sharp scans and graphics.

Dennis Jones

…nothing can touch a highly tuned mimeograph machine…

Don Jones

or the smell.