The SocMo Curiosity

March 15, 2005

SOCMO

I leave town for a week, come back, and find Socmo has made another appearance on Doug’s web page. I feel I need to try and clarify this fascination Doug has with sock monkeys.

This is something he has been dealing with for many years now. Here is a family photograph from a Christmas way back when and… yes that is Doug with his very first sock monkey. It has been a downward spiral since that point. Doug and SocMo are inseparable. It is similar to Linus and his blanket. Sad… so very sad.

Older children always have issues, as do the younger children. The burden always falls to we, the well adjusted middle children to keep things on the straight and narrow… right Margie?

The Comments

Don Jones

As I analyze this picture, it appears Margie is not hugging a Sock Monkey but some sort of little puppy? Doug still has that shirt hanging in his closet.

Dennis Jones

Yes, upon further analysis we can see the two older children receiving the coveted sock monkeys while Margie and I are getting who knows what… in fact… where am I in this picture?… I guess I must have been taking it…

mandy

you guys talk so much about socmo that he should have his own page on the brother jones site- he is so popular

mandy

the page would be called the adventures of socmo

Doug Jones

SocMo RULES!

Dennis Jones

Thats not a bad idea… SocMo writes much better journal page articles than I do…

mandy

everybody loves socmo

Don Jones

COMING SOON! Own your own SocMo for just $49.95. The Brother Jones web personality with the highest I.Q.

Dennis Jones

…maybe we can get mom to open a SocMo Sock Monkey Sweat Shop…

Perry and Mrs. Joyce

Brother Dennis: I just got this WebSite from Mother Jones, and you better tell her I contacted you, or we may both be in for it. You guys are just too clever for this Arkansan (by birth and retirement). Hug your Momma for me, when you see her. Cousin Perry

mandy

you should start selling sockmonkeys in the brotherjones shop because i would probobly by one

Margie

I never received a sock monkey for Christmas or any other event in my life. Should I have a problem with that??

Margie

I never received a sock monkey for Christmas or any other event in my life. Should I have a problem with that??

Margie

I never received a sock monkey for Christmas or any other event in my life. Should I have a problem with that??

Dennis Jones

WOW… THREE POSTS from my fellow middle child sister Margie… all saying the same thing… she must really mean business… that or she has one really weird computer that does everything in triplicate…

Doug Jones

I’ve been meaning to talk to Margie about her stuttering problem….

Roy

I know the person who took that picture and who made the monkey. Guess who????

Dennis Jones

Now Uncle Roy, don’t go trying to claim credit for this picture… I am pretty sure I was the one that took it… I distinctly remember having the camera up to my eye with one hand and my baby bottle in the other…

Roy

Dennis: As I recall you were never on the bottle.

Dennis Jones

hmmm… I think you might be right… it must have been a cup of coffee in my other hand…

Dennis Jones

…as I think about this a bit more I remember it very clearly… I was standing there with nothing on but a diaper, had the camera up to my eye with one hand and was holding a cup of coffee in the other. I was also smoking a carrot stick as I snapped the picture… thats why Margie has that shocked look on her face… it was quite a site…

Dennis Jones

…and as you can see, Doug was laughing AT ME because his baby brother is such a moron and Mary is obviously deep in thought trying to figure out some way to sit me down at the kitchen table and give me a crash course on manners and when and how to use them… DO I USE MY MANNERS NOW, MARY?

Don Jones

I was in the backyard stepping on rabbits.

Dennis Jones

I’m still mad at you about that…

Carrie

Does Don like stepping on rabbits? What are you talking about??

mandy

is that the same sock monkey you have now doug or did you get a new one

Don Jones

Carrie, I would rather not go into it… let’s just leave well enough alone. Let’s just say rabbits are jumpy and that makes little kids jumpy.
I’m not a rabbit killer like my brothers and sisters kept chanting…. over and over….

Dennis Jones

WABBIT KILLER!

Advertisements

Mutant Sock Monkeys

October 11, 2005

MutantSockMonkey

I cannot stay awake for an entire Monday Night Football game. If I plop down in front of a TV late at night I can only last an hour… maybe two before I fall fast asleep. Last nights game was a good one, so I made plans to stay awake for the whole thing.

Before the game started I drove to Walmart and (being secure in my manhood) bought a needle, thread and some buttons. I got a few odd looks from the ladies shopping in the sewing section with me, but I can handle it.

I drove back home, turned on the game, and built this mutant sock monkey while it was on.

I now plan to build an entire army of Monday Night Football Mutant Sock Monkeys. One day, my Monday Night Football Mutant Sock Monkeys and I will RULE THE WORLD Ha Ha Ha Ha…

ha ha… … … … ha… …

eh… … ahem…

…the good news is this did indeed keep me awake for the entire game. I even saw Ben Roethlisberger take the wicked hit to his leg at the end… hope he’s ok… seems to be a pretty good guy…

The Comments

Don Jones

That monkey is juiced! I’m guessing you didn’t follow any Sock Monkey blueprints. Maybe there is a market for VooDoo SocMonkeys. Stick a few pins in this and see if anyone complains.

Dennis Jones

..this is one strong monkey… look at those arms… I wanted to put a hat on him like Socmo… but his head doesn’t seem to want to cooperate…

Don Jones

Has Karen missed her sock yet?

Dennis Jones

I’m not that stupid… that’s one of my old socks… I’m not really wearing green argyles a lot these days…

Don Jones

It appears this sock monkey has nice dental work.

Dennis Jones

…and a somewhat pleasant personality… well… for a mutant sock monkey anyway…

Don Jones

I’m thinking you could name these sock monkeys based on someone from the MNF game like the Madden trailer. Invert his left knee and this could be Big Ben.

Doug Jones

SocMo is in L-O-V-E! He is requesting a phone number for this beauty.

Dennis Jones

867-5309… Tommy Tutone

Andy Smith

Hey How many socks does it take to make a sweet Mutant Sock Monkey?

Dennis Jones

…hmmm… I’m not sure if this is one of those “how many Jones’s does it take to screw in a light bulb” kind of questions or an honest to goodness question question… so I will gamble on it being the latter and say two…

Denis Kabistan

It’s a Jones conspiracy !

Don Jones

I just got back from the all new Liger Shoppe. Man, my head is spinning. So much Liger merchandise to choose from. I think I left my shopping cart on aisle seven…

Dennis Jones

…Don, there is a fine looking yellow man-bag that I think you would look really nice in at the Liger Shop…

Don Jones

You can’t fool me… man bag… yea right. That is your basic female canvas beach book tote. I will wait until it goes on sale.

Tami

Mutant sock monkeys…be very afraid. Do you guys mind if I post a link to your web site on mine…since I already did it? Just wanted to share the joy (and the Liger Shop)!

Dennis Jones

Hi Tami… Nice of you to drop by Brother Jones again… sure, link us up… and post a comment once in a while like you did in the old days so we can raise the level of discourse around this place…

Doug Jones

Tami… I was just checking our records and I think your semi-annual BrotherJones fees are due. pay up.

Don Jones

I checked out Tami’s site and she out-classes us by a mile. She’s got good grammer and spelling and everthing going on. Instead of listing us on the LINKS page… she might want to create a more appropriate DETOUR page to our web uRL.

Doug Jones

URL place, or mine? a little web humor there….

My Official Weekend Report

February 12, 2007

GreenMo1

…in the laboratory…

GreenMo2

…it’s …ALIVE…

This is my official weekend report as required by the legal division of BrotherJonesOnTheWeb. Why I am the only brother that has to fill one of these forms out, I do not know.

The weather has turned vicious here in Northeastern Indiana, and we are running low on fire wood. This, however, is not a problem for a manly woodcutter like me. I walked into my garage to fire up my manly chain saw only to discover that whoever used it last had knocked the chain off and left the saw in disrepair. I, (of course), was the last person to use my chain saw sometime last summer.

I put the saw back together, (a very manly thing to do), did a cold weather start on it, hiked into the woods behind my house and started cutting lumber. I then drove my SUV back to collect the wood, got it stuck in a snow drift, got it unstuck, and then made several manly trips back and forth picking up wood, hauling wood and stacking wood.

Then I made a sock monkey… another very manly thing to do.

The Comments

Don Jones

This morning on the news they were reporting that burning freshly cut wood from the ice damage was not a good idea. it needs to DRY OUT (for about a year). Otherwise, you are building up some serious creosote in your chimney by burning it. I suggest burning your dirty laundry for heat. Stay warm and cut down on your warshin’ at the same time.

Dennis Jones

sorry, can’t talk now… putting out fire in house…

Dennis Jones

…make that house fire… gotta go…

Don Jones

HOOK UP A HOSE! Better yet…. GRAB THE HOT DOGS and MARSHMELLOWS!!!

Doug Jones

great looking monkey! uh, great looking MANLY sock monkey, that is… I can read the expression on his face… it says, “I wanna move to Florida!” It got down to freezing for a couple of days here and I immediately got tired of winter. I actually had to put a coat on… can you believe it? Two days of cold weather is all I need. No sign of flakes so far. This is all good cuz I don’t have a chainsaw… or woods to go cut down trees in. but we DO have deer that were eating anything green in our flower garden yesterday…

Doug Jones

Hey… I was expecting to see Weasel Boy on the Grammys last night. What happened? Did you get bumped by Sting?

Dennis Jones

…WeaselBoy wasn’t even nominated for anything! …what’s up with that?

WeaselBoy

😦

Dennis Jones

…they’ve been predicting bad weather for us all week and last night our Severe Winter Weather WATCH turned into a Severe Winter Weather WARNING… fortunately, today we are no longer under that warning… we are now under a BLIZZARD Warning… whew!… I think we dodged a bullet on that one…

Dennis Jones

…hmm …they’re saying now that we are going to have white out conditions …I didn’t think they even made white out any longer… I mean, with computers and all, who really needs it anymore? …anyway, I looked out the window to see what was going on, but couldn’t really see anything…

Dennis Jones

…hmm …they just declared a Level 2 Travel Advisory… unless you are an emergency vehicle you will be ticketed if you are on the road driving around… but I am needing a Krispie Kreme Donut right now, REALLY BAD and there are none left in the house… that’s an emergency, isn’t it?

Don Jones

GET IN THE CAR AND GO NOW MAN!!! IF JACK BAUER CAN UNDO NUKLEEAR BOMBS YOU CAN GET TO WAL-MART AND BACK WITH DONUTS!!!

Dennis Jones

…I guess I didn’t realize how simple it is to disarm a nuclear bomb… but after watching Jack disarm one on TV last night I feel pretty confident that I could do it, too, in a pinch… if that situation ever arose here in Huntington… like in my neighborhood or something…

Doug Jones

If you could put one of those Nookier suitcase bombs on your driveway, it would probably get rid of your snow for you… and your neighbor’s snow… and your neighbor’s neighbor’s snow… and ….

Don Jones

Attention my brothers I’m planning on buying a couple of syringes of Sodium Pentothal for you next Christmas.

Doug Jones

oh, goody! I love it when we play “torture the brother!”

Dennis Jones

…I’m thinking Jack is going to have to kill his entire family plus a couple of in-laws to save the world this time…

Don Jones

and the little dog too!!!

Dennis Jones

…NOT TOTO!!!

Doug Jones

how much snow do you have???

Dan Lietha

If those of you in this ice-encased frozen zone are trapped in your house (that hasn’t burnt down from creosote build up in the chimney) and you have to wait for the ice to melt to rejoin civilization, check out this guy’s digital painting info blog: danidraws.com Great info!

Dan Lietha

Correction … check out this GAL’S digital painting web site: danidraws.com OOPS!

Doug Jones

I had just found this site recently myself… great information there!

Doballoo

I see she’s a D. Jones too. That does it I’m changing my name to Doballoo Jones in an attempt to monetize on my nascent illustration career

Dennis Jones

…ok, well now… where are we today? I started shoveling snow at the crack of dawn and did that for most of the morning… how much snow did we get you ask? …pastorally speaking I would have to say we had drifts at least 12 feet high… realistically more like 2 or 3… which is nothing to snuff at when you are shoveling it all by hand… so now I’m trying to catch up on work…

…I noticed the danidraws girls last name is Jones… she’s not a sister I’ve accidentally forgotten about, is she?

Dougaloo

Dougaloo… has a nice ring to it, eh? I don’t recall a sister named Dani… maybe one named Mani would be more like it…

Don Jones

How about our sister Norah? We’ve yet to hear from her since she hit the bigtime…

Huntington Monkey Grams

February 15, 2007

MonkeyGram1

…a special delivery Monkey Gram…

MonkeyGram2

…custom made for Valentine’s Day…

MonkeyGram3

…a rigorous marketing campaign…

Have you ever noticed that every time a holiday rolls around you start hearing on the radio that a really great gift would be a Lobster Gram… or a Pajama Gram… or a Vermont Teddy Bear?

I was teasing my wife the other day telling her that with all the snow we had gotten I wasn’t sure whether her Pajama Gram would arrive in time for Valentines Day or not. She said, “Listen buddy, if I get a Pajama Gram for Valentines Day you’re toast.”

Good thing I got her a Huntington Monkey Gram instead.

The Comments

Dougaloo

I like those long, skinny arms and legs. SocMo would like for this guy to come over to play with him. You can send him along when you ship those unused chips and salsa to me…

Doug Jones

Hmmm… I seem to be going by the name Dougaloo now… just so you don’t get confused. DON”T send it to any other of those LOO guys…

Dennis Jones

…I have been studying SocMo and trying to figure out what gives him his attitude… I think I got it… it’s the sock hat… my next monkey is gettin’ a sock hat…

Doug Jones

of course it’s the hat! you wouldn’t send a sock monkey out in this weather without a had would ya?

Dennis Jones

…word on the street is Huntington Monkey Grams will soon be offering their “aLOO” line of monkeys which features the DougaLOO Salsa Monkey, the DonaLOO No Coffee Monkey and the beloved original, RobaLOO Snuggle Monkey…

Don Jones

There’s nothing on Valentine’s Day that says “I love you” more than a car load of green wood, some stale chips and salsa, and a handcrafted Huntington Monkey Gram! Good job DennyLOO.

Dennis Jones

…who wouldn’t be thrilled to receive an old sock for a Valentines Day present?

Don Jones

It’s thoughtful AND economical!

Skip to my Loo

what about me?

Roballoo

If you wait too long, skipping to the loo is not a good idea.